Cautious optimism

So far today, I've had no head-spinny incidents. If this keeps up, I'll restart my workout routine tomorrow.

Since I've already wandered off the supposed topics that this blog is about, now I'm going to go into further uncharted territory. Specifically the amazing ability for the human mind to strive for change and then be surprised when it happens.

Today, I finally broke down and admitted that with the weight loss that has happened on the incredible diet/exercise program I've been following, my bras didn't fit no mo'. Luckily, I throw nothing away, so I had all of my "thin" bras to go back to.

I feel like I'm turning back the clock. The weight I'm at now I was last at 3.5 years ago. The clothing I am wearing now is from that time frame, too. Back to my 20s, woo! :> As I said to Daven, I can only go back so far, since I was at my lightest when I first met him 4 years ago, at 175. Anything beyond that is uncharted territory for me as an adult, and that is only 12 lbs away. Considering the changes I've had so far, it isn't out of the question for me to reach that again.

This time, however, I will reach it via good diet and exercise, and I will reach it with growing strength. Before my whole "my brain is trying to escape" week, I had hit a new strength record for lifting 15 lbs more than my body weight in my favourite lift. This is more than just a relative strength increase; I had previously topped out with this lift at 175 for three reps, but I got 7 reps at 205, and I felt I could increase the weight. (If you lift, I was doing Romanian dead lifts, which I really enjoy. Full dead lifts are too hard on my knees, and I'm not built for 'em, but Romanians are fantastic for me.)

The last time I was thin, I was "skinny fat". You could poke me in the middle and your finger would keep on going. This was great from the corsetry standpoint, but not so good from the "being strong" standpoint. Now I've got muscles behind the rapidly decreasing layer of squish. This is the leanest I have ever been, and the happiest I have been with how my body looks. I still have a lot of work to go, but with the awesome guidance of my trainer, and the support (and cooking) of Daven, I am going to achieve my goal of being every inch the amazon I want to be!